Member-only story
1
The following chapter about my parents was written on December 22, 2022, high in the sky as I was flying to Tokyo.
When I lose internet access, I get caught up in my own thoughts. In November 2018, when I came to Tokyo for a “scout” to see if it was possible to live here, I wrote no-stop on the plane. I thought about before I was 18, and after I turned 18. I already knew that, just like leaving my hometown in Hubei, I would have to leave Beijing. The left at 18 and the leaving now, the two moments overlapping, and I was lost in it.
So I know I’m missing my parents, and I know I want to write something. Writing is a formal way of missing , self-organizing, and completing a farewell within oneself. In this way, I once again confirm the path forward.
2
After my dad retired, he had complete control over his pension and spent it on things like cigarettes, sweets, lottery tickets, or fake antiques, and didn’t provide support for the household. My brother and I have been supporting my mom, who is very frugal and manages their household expenses. In this situation, my dad doesn’t have money left over, and my mom occasionally say she has saved some.
The topic of my moving abroad had been brought up before and my parents had…
